I just got back from my trial, which seemed to go on forever and really made me think of how ridiculous it is that people are putting so much time and effort into getting me convicted for a cake.
If i did not feel so much contempt for them i think i would feel sad for them and their empty, meaningless lives lol.
But today i got to see my two wonderful friends in the courtroom and catching their eyes, making each other laugh and smile was definitely a good way to spend 5 hours.
It meant alot to have some support in that room, i guess i did never truly appreciated the impact it has on keeping high spirits until now.
Also it was a reminder that things go on while i am here, and that people are living theire lives while supporting me, and this is good to remember. Thanks for being there, beautiful people, i love you!
I have been imprisoned for 2 weeks nearly. In some ways i am getting used to being here, having a routine an eating well, making friends and keeping busy reading and writing really helps me through alot, espcially in times of isolation. my cell gets alot of light which makes it a nice feeling place until it is time to be locked in at 8, and the sun is still shining and then this is kind of shitty. i realised this is the first time since leaving my parents home that that i have had a ‘room of my own’ very weird to be in place and have my ‘things’, shame its in a fucking prison cell, otherwise it would be very nice!
But i am surrounded by cards, letters, drawings zines, art etc. from amazing people sending in support. this really was very overwhelming to receive i cried for a while
to feel the love energy humor and resistance pouring out of the pages was very necessary to feel as i was quite down that day. needing a hug, and someone to kick me up the ass, an say: cmon lets show them they will never win!! and that was just what i needed. So thanks buddies, i can not wait for the chance to thank you all in person where we can laugh sing and create chaos.
Since getting all this support and knowing how necessary it is to keep people their heads high, high above the states oppression and their attempts to crush our spirits i really would like to get more involved with ABC activity even just spending more time writing letters and connecting others to do the same. How realistic would it be to start a AABC on the road? probably difficult but manageable.
maybe people could send me some tips or information that i can get started on. i also really want to contact other prisoners around Europe (or (anywhere else for that matter (it just needs more time for elsewhere)
if people can send addresses and things of other people captured then i would really appreciate that there is a prison radio show that some people where are involved in it would be great to get involved in that and make a good use of my time here.
In two letters, friends have told me that this whole thing has brought a lot of people together to pump some energy into a ‘lull’ in radical action recently here in Oslo, that was very good to hear ofcourse i would reather be outside doing fun stuff in a beautifull forest but if a consequence of me being locked up is amazing people getting together to put plans into action and stand deviant into the face of state repression and police brutality as well as all the other things we have to deal with in the shitty world well then thats some kind of compensation. haha. So i dont really care that i am in (i do kind of care haha) it seems like we develop and put our ideas into practice a lot when something suddenly happens that moves people to rage in spontaneous subversion even if those feelings of anger are already manifesting as something. i guess it helps when a event takes place that pushes us forward to say a big fuck you to the destructive force that capitalist patriarchy is. So whilst people being imprisoned is so shit and humiliating lets all come together to help break each other out. or at least remind them through letters and things that fire burns in the hearts of all of us. and that we dont forget anyone.
Apparently i am on the Norwegian tv a lot in the last days everyone here thinks its hilarious (which it is when you take fascist deterrent/punishment out of the picture) they have called me the prison celebrity which is pretty funny on one hand but on the other totally ruins any kind of semi anonymity that i might had (although being in a band makes that pretty hard already after the cistemfailure/vivazapata karaoke tour i dont think we will have any privacy left )
obviously this makes things more risky, or more difficult for the future if it comes back to fuck something up. I guess i have to make some reviews on my security culture practices.
most days at lunch time the guards sit and eat with us at this table, in the kitchen. its like a family meal setting since there is only 15 people in my cell block. but when the guards are not their its great. but when they are i want to be sick at their presence at their fucking audacity to play happy families with the people they get paid to enforce such a violation of freedom upon. it really makes me so disgusted i ont think anyone else shares this view here though, which is quite frustrating.
I got my sentence today 45 days instead of 40. fucking pissed. but expecting that, at least now i got to tell the guard what i really thougt of that fucking minister and the fallacy of existence that she endorses replicates and festers in a sicking display of assimilation and ‘solidarity’ competition for votes. i am also reeling right now at something i just saw in the news. about the person who killed a bunch of cops in dallas us. the senior cops got to sit their and defend the actions of cops when they shoot black people, like there is no tomorrow. and then called the reactions of people grieving, devastated, raging a ‘hype’
holy shit. that reminded me why i feel why i do. hearing this words come out of his mouth, i am thinking gof all the families and the loved ones of every single african amarican, latinx, or white person that has been killed by a trigger happy white supremacist piece of shit cop. and hoping that they do not suffer the humiliating pressure and demands to apologize for any violent action against the cops. i hope that the acts of this person can lead people to a clearer and more critical understanding of what the police actually do, what they stand for and who they really protect. this is so sad.
today i listened to Radorakel to hear Fearg and Xav talk about the events at Dublin pride in ireland as they said, a very fine example and even confirmation of the true nature of the guardee (police) was that whilst the LGBT section of cops got to honorably take part in dublin pride ltd (thats right L fucking T fucking D) Behind the building they marched along side were the radical queers where being violently attacked by the same force that proclaims its support, tolerance (thanks for tolerating our existence yo) and even their part in lgbtq ‘community’ and alliance. Of course, our queeros of the day got charged have been charged with several accounts of assault, but we know that already.
big love and respect to you all, remember to take care of each other in such repressive times. <3 (also thanks to the cool bunch at grangegorman for the hilarious banner, you are great)
i have hated cops for a long time. but the last couple of weeks, have really demonstrated to me, more and more that they are the enemy in every shape and form. i have concluded that the only thing prison guards are good at is walking in on me taking a shit, they seem to be very skilled at that so far. lol.
at the moment, i am very angry but i still have a lot of love in here. i want to say a huge thanks and hugs/kisses/whatever you all like, for the post i am receiving, it keeps things real, and lovely to remember that you are all their. massive love to the treasure of my heart and sunshine of my day, you know who you are. to all those getting them selfs together, to support me from the outside, you are truly wonderful and i wish i could hang out with you all right now, next time though
keep fighting, loving, sabotaging, laughing. <3